Dolus

Finished this editing run.  Now I need to boost the word count by about 10,000.  None of it can be filler, so I'm gonna sit with my cork board and index cards and see what kind of wrenches I can toss in.

I'm still a little driven to work on Stars Collide in the meantime, but somehow I think I'll get lost in that work.  I guess I'll see how long I'm starting at the Dolus plot without any progress before touching it.

I have to admit, the closer the Conference gets, the more nervous I am.  To the point of believing I'll fail no matter what.  I've taken to listing not only what I can do to improve my work, but also why I shouldn't loose my confidence.  Putting this into the hands of fate is very difficult.  If it's meant to happen, it'll happen.  I worked hard on the manuscript and I'm always looking for a way to improve.  Somehow, I don't think it'll be enough.  Too bad we can't predict the future in a very clear manner. (I have belief that a good tarot card reader can see elements of a future, but not well enough to say clearly what will happen.)

Enough of this.  I'll approach the agent no matter what and she promised me a second chance.  Either she'll like it or she won't.  And she'll make helpful comments.  She's not the only agent out there.  It's not like I'll have her answer before August anyway.  No more thinking 'what if…'  I'm letting it go.  Trying to.  Usually I love my imagination, but it really sucks in this instance.

On a happy note, my short story 'The Race' will be published and in my hands the day of the Conference.  I'll hold onto that.